So we had a decent year in music in Bollywood. There were some truly brilliant songs which can’t be praised enough. But like always, we did have our share of laughable songs, rather songs which made you want to cry. We’ve listed down the top 15 worst Bollywood tracks of 2014.
15. Mohabbat Barsa De (Creature 3D)
Arijit Singh is a great singer, there is no denying that. But after listening to twenty different songs that sound just the same, we would like to plead music directors to not give him the same kind of songs. The accompanying singers, Arjun and Samira Koppikar try to bring in some new sounds in the track but in the end, it just seems like the music director, Tonny Kakkar’s attempt at recreating another Tum Hi Ho. We don’t want another Tum Hi Ho.
14. Hangover (Kick)
With music by Meet Bros and sung by the bhai himself along with Shreya Ghoshal, this is the kind of song produced just for promotional aspects. In an effort to do so, the directors have forgotten completely about the quality of music. Babydoll (composed by the same duo) had a peppiness that could not be resisted. On the contrary, Hangover is the ear worm that tortures you and it is not the kind of song that you want getting stuck in your head, which it does. We would really like to know how the Meet Bros got Shreya Ghoshal to do something like this. Salman Khan will get your movie to be a hit with just being in it. His music will also be loved by the masses. You don’t need to go an extra step and actually get him to sing it. Having said that, the issue is not the singing, because it is what it would be in this kind of a song- not impressive, but not wince-worthy. The issue is the music direction. Period.
13. Harry Is Not A Brahmachari (Shaadi Ke Side Effects)
This is what we get when Pritam tries to compose a party/club song with Jazzy B’s help. When the cast of the movie includes Farhan Akhtar in the leading role, you know nothing can go wrong with the movie, and by his current track record, its music. Shadi Ke Side Effects managed to shatter those expectations tremendously. Maybe the people being considered here have set a standard too high for themselves for us to appreciate such minimal efforts by them at creating music.
12. Besharmi Ki Height (Main Tera Hero)
This song has everything. Cliched beats, inappropriate lyrics, bikes, leather jackets and flashy lights. Sajid-Wajid have created a set of beats that is so similar to ’Subha Hone Na De (Tu Mera hero)’ from Desi Boyz, which remains one of India’s best party songs. Is it a coincidence that the name of this movie is ‘Main Tera Hero’?
11. Lucky Tu Lucky Me (Humpty Sharma Ki Dulhania)
Composed by Sachin-Jigar, this song from Humpy Sharma Ki Dulhaniya does not really serve any purpose, neither for the movie, nor for its music album. Another party song gone bad, Lucky Tu Lucky Me has music which is plain disappointing. And its lyrics say ‘Banda main bachelor, tu kanya kanwari; Aaja ho jaaye thoda, lucky tu lucky me’
10. India Wale (Happy New Year)
Maybe Farah Khan and Vishal Shekhar intended this song to instill the feeling of love for the country among us Indians, but all it did was remind us of the pointless things Bollywood keeps coming up with (We actually adore Bollywood quite a lot). Even the flashy execution on the silver screen couldn’t help the song much. Nor does Dadlani, who can make us like some songs just because of his magical voice, do much good to it.
9. Suno Na Sangemarmar (Youngistaan)
This has been regarded as the ‘Valentine Song Of The Year’, probably by the producers themselves. Composed by Jeet Ganguly for the movie Youngistaan, the song has lyrics and music typical of current Bollywood scenario and, of Arijit Singh songs. Promoted as the new “love anthem”, this one will make you cringe.
8. Happy Budday (Kill Dil)
In the review of 2 states which was number 5 in our top Bollywood music albums list this year, we wrote that it is really awe-worthy that Shankar Ehsaan Loy manage to be this consistent. We won’t take it back, but they make a strong case for this to be revoked by giving us Happy Budday. What. Is. It?
7. Tu Meri (Bang Bang)
Well, this is just bad music. It is bad, bad music. Here you have Vishal Dadlani telling you a million ways in which you can say the word “tu”. That word makes up for 80% of the song, and also for the irritation it causes. When you reach the chorus of the song, you actually get a feeling that your player is stuck, and not in a trippy way. Being an admirer of Vishal Dadlani, it saddens me to have two compositions by Vishal-Shekhar on this list. But, their recent endeavors don’t really help maintain their standing. These two have composed the music of Shanghai. And then they give us this. Let’s just leave it at that.
6. Hum Pagal Nahi Hain (Humshakals)
If you haven’t heard this song yet, or don’t recall even hearing the name, let us tell you that it has been composed and sung by Himesh Reshammiya (no offence to Reshammiya, I loved the Namastey London soundtrack). From the movie Humshakals, the song is as imbecile as the movie. The video of the song is enough to tell you to stay away from the movie. With the lyrics that are at the least amateurish, this song will definitely leave you with half a brain. Again, it seems like the lack of creativity with the lyrics took down the entire musical set-up.
5. Photocopy (Jai Ho)
And Reshammiya strikes again. This time in Gujarati. Composed by Sajid-Wajid, it is sung by the man with many caps, along with Keerthi Sagathia & Palak Muchhal. Even after the dhol beats and a multitude of other beats, this song failed to make its way to the parties in India and for good reason. The lyrics are incomprehensible for the most part, yet, you can get the crux of the song and the theme doesn’t really stand out.
4. Sunny Sunny (Yaariyan)
There are not enough words to describe the atrocity that this song is. More than the music, its the lyrics that make you rethink your belief in Hindi music. You know you are in trouble when you need a song to tell you the colour of the water, that too repeatedly. The worst part about this track that it as been played at every single party in 2014, and people seem to enjoy it quite a bit.
3. Johnny Johnny (Its Entertainment)
This is the second composition by Sachin-Jigar on our list. This song epitomizes everything that is wrong with Bollywood music today. The lyrics, written by Mayur Puri, are bizarre beyond limits. Jigar himself sings for a good part of the song, along with Madhav Krishna and Priya. The only word we could think of for this track is “cheap”. Even the fans of Honey Singh who appreciate music like “that”, would agree with us on this one.
2. Caller Tune (Humshakals)
It seems like Mr. Reshammiya is all over this list. On number 2, we have his composition Caller Tune from the movie Humshakals. First off, why would someone make a song based on caller tunes? Probably the same reason why they make songs on Hookah Bars (Yes, Reshammiya). Secondly, why would respectable singers like Neeti Mohan and Neeraj Sridhar take up a song like this? Besides, what is up with the lyrics of the song? We are not asking for another Gulzar or Javed Akhtar, but we would definitely like something better than this:
“Mujhe apni bana le caller tune, soniye; Everytime I see you, I am above the moon, soniye; Tujhe chahun summer, winter, monsoon, soniye.”
1. Ice Cream (The Xposé)
And Himesh Reshammiya has won our countdown. Not only has he topped our list, he has also got the most number of spots on the list. This track is something we have never seen before. Yet, it has elements from all the hit songs that have come our way over the years. This song is what happens when Himesh Reshammiya and Yo Yo Honey Singh join hands and make music. An attempt to recreate the magic of the musical golden age of the 60s, this song must have made even Helen second guess those times. A horrible copy of the groovy music of the 60s, it has all the ingredients for bad music. Shabbir Ahmed has penned the lyrics and we want to ask him if he was in the correct sense of mind to do it. ‘Ice cream khaungi, Kashmir jaaungi, Sholo mein bhadke jiyaa; Jalve karaungi, Usko rijhaungi, Jo hoga mera piyaa’. Is it an ode to the wonderful invention of ice-cream? Is it an ad for Cream Bell? Is it a song to seduce your lover? If you find out, do tell us.
Oh, and did you know? The Xposé – 2, the movie’s sequel, is coming out next year with its music releasing in April. Perhaps number one on the 2015 list is also bagged by Mr. Reshamiya.